BDSM Sex - The private blog!

It’s alright to get excited about BDSM sex especially if you are having it for the first time. While the general requirement in all types of BDSM sex is to have both the partners involved to be matured enough to know what they are doing, there are other guidelines that may be useful too. These guidelines have been developed from my own personal experiences with BDSM sex. Given below are few of these guidelines.

Before you start experimenting with your bodies, you need to understand or learn few secret code words. No doubt, you might be eager to get going with your intercourse or playing with nipples and vagina with the help of your partner. But hang on. What if something goes wrong? It is in these circumstances, the so called secret codes will come handy. For instance, you may say ‘Red-Yellow-Green’. ‘Red’ would mean you need to stop everything at that very instance. ‘Yellow’ means you don’t have to stop doing what you have been doing but shouldn’t be much harder than the present attempt. ‘Green’ means you can get going with your act with full freedom. These codes have been particularly useful to me and I am sure everybody would be comfortable with it.

It is not uncommon for people to use floggers while in BDSM sex. It is basically a long whip that is used to induce some amount of pain on the body. Though they might look scary at times, actually they are far from it. In buying a flogger for yourself, you are bound to be confused. Try to avoid cheap floggers that are thick and not rounded properly. These floggers can give serious pain and cause injuries if not used properly. In addition to floggers, people often try with other materials like handcuffs, ropes, chains and so on to keep their partner in bondage and then experimenting on their bodies. There are other sections of people who use silk clothing to have their partner tied up at one place. However gentle they seem to be, they can be quite threatening. Knots made out of them are difficult to remove and can pinch you while removing.

In case you are your partner are playing the roles of submission and dominance in BDSM sex, ensure that you play them to perfection; or at least close to it. Swapping of roles in the midst of a session is never a good option. Having oral sex on each other’s side is a good idea. There are plenty of nerve endings present near genital areas of both man and a woman. Stimulating any of these nerves can ignite orgasm. Be it a penis or a vagina, you need to perform oral sex while you are relaxed. You shouldn’t tighten up yourself too much. If required, lubricants can be applied appropriately to arrive at better results. Application of these lubricants will be useful if you are performing anal sex on your partner. From a woman’s point of view, it would be wise move to apply a recommended jelly on either sides of the vagina’s opening.

Welcome to the big, bad erotic world of BDSM. It’s a world which deals with the finer aspects of intimacy between couples. Common terminologies included in BDSM are bondages, discipline, submission and dominance. Though on a larger context BDSM refers to sexual intimacy, it needn’t be always. The common relationships and activities we share with our close ones can also be eroticized to new levels within a BDSM context. These feelings could well fall within or outside the general social norms of this world.

In of the practices involved in BDSM, there is a power shift from one partner to another. While one of the partners is dominant the other is submissive. The first partner can also be referred to as a ‘master’ or ‘top’ and the other partner can be referred to as a ‘slave’ or as a ‘bottom’. Whatever the combination be, there is always a change in the control amongst the partners involved. Let me elaborate this in the form of an example. I am 24 year old lady and my partner is 27 year old. Now, there are two possibilities of power control amongst us during sex. In one of the ways, I can be a dominant partner and he can be submissive. The other way to look at this would be my partner being dominant while I can be under submission mode.

These power fluctuations can easily bound the two partners into a beautiful rhythm. While none of us would be tied down to our expectation levels, we can expect our bondage to strengthen with every act of sex between us. Another aspect of BDSM is that we can have ‘sessions’ or ‘plays’ whenever we want to. As a young lady, I have had the privilege of going through these intimate sessions with my partner not so long ago. The whole experience of this was really awesome. No doubt, I am bound to have some of these intimate moments sooner or later. I am certainly looking forward to the next one.

The partners tied under BDSM principles would do well to understand that there are clear distinctions between BDSM and violence or assaults associated with it. It is therefore safe for partners to perform BDSM acts only when they are mature enough to do it. I have been really fortunate enough to have my partner who understands me and my body. What’s more, he is very mature. This goes with the fact that as a 24 year old lady, I am mature enough to indulge in these aspects. No wonder then that with mutual consent we had out first sexual intercourse not so long ago. While both of us were comfortable doing it, we enjoyed it every bit. In fact, the act was so lively that it has left me craving for more! It is a common a phenomenon for the partners involved in the act to go all the way to satisfy each other. However, it is always better to respect the safety norms before and after each session.

Fantasies in BDSM

Fantasies in BDSM are not just limited to sex. Wild imagination can also play their part in evoking your body to explore new things. To go with wild imagination, instant pain and relief can also be pretty useful. Just imagine yourself having a deep body massage from your partner. While this can give you pain momentarily, the relief that come after this act is some thing you wouldn’t want to miss out on. This can easily set you up for more sex and more of wild fantasies.

From my own experience, I can tell you that fantasies play a vital role in BDSM. It may not always be possible to have your partner with you most of the times. In these circumstances, I generally start fantasizing about various things like having a warm water bath with my partner, a massage session with him and so on. Some times I even dream of going into submission during a sexual act. No doubt, for fantasies to come true, a positive bondage between the members is very important. The partners thus involved have to be tied to responsibility and have to realize that each one of them should do their best to satisfy the other.

Fantasies in BDSM allow you to venture into unknown territories and in most cases those areas where otherwise it wouldn’t have been possible for you to be in. Some times, I fantasize of me being in submission to three different partners at a single time. Though in reality, it is not going to happen, fantasizing this way will enable me to think other unexplored areas of my sexual life. I don’t have to be tied down to rituals or my daily chores to fantasize. I am bound to be a free bird and ready to fly across different horizons.

Being a young woman all of 24 years, it’s hard for me control my feelings towards my man. I do indulge in sexual encounters with him whenever he is around or fantasize about our acts when he is not around. I often dream of myself playing with different sex related toys. I do think of masturbating and penetrating myself with the help of these toys. While it doesn’t cost me a penny to think about these things, I can still enjoy myself to fullest. Now, isn’t that a beautiful thing to do? Having raised the case of toys in my fantasies, I would like to dwell on it a bit more.

Sex toys come in different forms. Their sizes, colors, shapes can vary a great deal. In addition to them being used in actual sex, they can be used while fantasizing about sex. The great aspect with these toys is that you don’t even have to be bound to your partners or be in submission to him or her. You don’t have to follow moral obligations to satisfy yourself using these toys. Just relax, feel comfortable with these toys and allow them to take over you. You are certain to feel difference with them.

BDSM in my sexual life

However different it may mean, BDSM as an element exists in almost everybody’s sexual lives. People involved in it may or may not be totally aware of it. Few people may perceive BDSM sex to be a sick stuff that is practiced by less sensitive beings. While others think about it in a totally different way. Whatever the theory behind BDSM sex be, there’s no denying the fact that a sexual encounter in BDSM can be sensual and subtle one. One of the classical examples of BDSM in my sexual life is running ice cubes down the body of my boyfriend. Obviously, there are other ways too. You may even use rabbit fur, brushes, and silk and so on.

According to me, BDSM and wild fantasies go hand in hand. I am a 24 year female and from my own personal experience I can conclude that BDSM can go a long way in realizing the sexual fantasies of both the partners included in the act. I often imagine of being in submission to my boyfriend during sex. There are also times when I consider myself tied in bondage. These sexual fantasies both in real and in thought can easily excite you to the limits and push you to perform even better. What’s more, these BDSM activities are completely safe to practice provided both the partners are matured enough to carry them through.

As an individual, you may or may not have enough knowledge in these matters. If you don’t have one, do not worry. There are many websites that exclusively deal with BDSM sex and more. Through these sites you can easily come across many bondage gears and fetish stories. Don’t be surprised if you get to see many unthinkable acts. They may look wild to you but in reality they exist only to bring back your excitement and arouse you for a sexual session. As an individual practicing BDSM sex quite often with my boyfriend; I ensure that I tried out most of the things associated with it. My boyfriend ties me up with leather belts or ropes and then starts to explore my body to the fullest. Sometimes, I get my pussy wired up as well. This might look strange to many. But if you were to take my word, it is well worth experiencing at least once. You will certainly crave for more.

In return to his service; if I may say so, I will have his ass whipped off using a tiny stick or a smooth belt. This might occasionally cause him pain but is sure to give him sexual relief as well. Both of us also use fucking machines widely. While these machines are working on me, I presume myself to be in submission to them. In return, I get satisfied to the core. Just like any sport played on earth, BDSM sex can be a memorable experience to few and not so memorable to others. However, that shouldn’t stop you from asking more of it. As a lady who has experienced all these things, I can assure you that you are bound to get satisfied at one point in time or other.